Sophie Pateyuk '28 is a professional procrastinator, part-time overthinker, and full-time observer of life’s weird little moments. When not convincing themselves that this will be the week they get their life together, they can be found making oddly similar playlists to the last one she just made on spotify, going out with friends and wondering if that one embarrassing thing they did in the fourth grade talent show still haunts anyone else. They also just enjoy writing about the thoughts we all have but rarely say out loud or make known to many.

“Locked In or Locked Out?”: The Ultimate Guide to Actually Finish the School Year Without Becoming a Zombie

It’s basically the final month of school. The weather’s nice, the grass is probably a bit greener than your GPA right now, and mentally, you’ve been on summer vacation since Spring Break (maybe even Winter Break). Suddenly, “locked in” becomes a phrase teachers seem to use as some sort of desperate prayer, while students pass through the halls forgetting whether they have three classes in the morning and late lunch or two classes in the morning and early lunch. 

But don’t worry!!! If you’ve caught yourself googling “how many absences can I legally have before they notice?” (surely I have way too many, more than I should… yeah, no, at this point, I think I have more than any student should have), here’s your kinda-satirical, mostly real guide to staying locked in—and not locked out—for these last few weeks.

1. Make a To-Do List, Then Actually Look at It

Sure, you made the list. That’s half the battle. The other half? Doing literally anything on it. Try bribing yourself: “If I finish this Bio Lab, I get 30 minutes of aimlessly scrolling through TikTok like that brings purpose to my life.” Reward systems work (unless you reach 31 minutes on TikTok and then say you’ll continue to finish your work in another four minutes = 35 minutes), just make sure your reward isn't "dropping out emotionally."

2. Romanticize Studying Like You’re in a Movie Montage

Grab a caffeinated drink, put on a whatever playlist, and stare at your laptop like it’s your long-lost soulmate. Maybe you’re not understanding that review packet—but hey, you look focused. Half the battle is aesthetics:).

Bonus points if you mutter, “Ohhh this makes sense now (when it really does not),” like you're the main character in a show no one asked for.

3. Find a Study Buddy Who’s Equally Panicked But Slightly More Functional

You don’t need someone who’s fully got it together; surely, that’s too intimidating. You want someone who’s just a little more “locked in” than you, someone who still uses highlighters unironically and hasn’t completely ghosted their To-Do list yet. Create that motivation for them that you have already fully lost for yourself at this point.

4. Build the Illusion of Urgency

Pretend everything is due earlier than it is. Is it? Maybe (I don’t know I’d probably still procrastinate anyway ,but you know what? It’s okay because basically we’re all locked in). But will you crash out either way? Absolutely. The least you can do is set alarms and reminders with aggressive headers like:
“TURN IN HISTORY PAPER OR FAIL.” You know, I tried that once. I don’t remember if it helped or not, but aye, it’s always worth a try! 

Fear is, surprisingly, an effective motivator.

5. Make Peace With the Grind

At this point in time, yes, you’ve made it this far. I mean, you could give up now, but what would that help? You’ve made it this far. Accept your fate and push through; that’s all anyone could do at this point in time. Make peace with the fact that there is one month left of school, and you’re an academic weapon, so stay locked in because surely you already are. 

6. Lock In, Log Off

Put your phone in timeout—not just flipped over, not on “do not disturb.” Put it in a different room, under a laundry basket, a pillow, a cover, etc. with a note taped on top that says “Do Not Resurrect.” TikTok will still be there when you emerge. (If you don’t have TikTok or Instagram or even SnapChat—which most probably do—you’re truly locked in). 

(And the For You page will still be wildly off because you watched ONE video too many.)

7. Tell Yourself You Deserve to Finish Strong (Because You Do)

You’re not doing this for a grade (Well…most of us are, but we like to think we’re doing it for ourselves). For the kid who started this year with big hopes, fresh notebooks, and no idea how to format a Works Cited page: Give them a win. Show them you can finish what you started—even when the summer weather calls you.

Remember: You’ve got one more round. This isn’t the end. It’s the last mark to lock in, and finish like the academic weapon you are and we both know you can pretend to be for three more weeks.

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To contact the author: Sophie Pateyuk '28

Photo by Natalie Gonzalez