Well-being: Support and Resources

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 (TALK), suicidepreventionlifeline.org. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.

• 2NDFLOORNJ Youth Helpline: 1-888-222-2228, www.2ndfloor.org. 2NDFLOOR is a confidential,anonymous, 24/7 helpline for New Jersey's youth and young adults. If you are between the ages of 10 and 24, live in New Jersey, and need to talk about an issue or problem that you are facing, call or text anytime.

• The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7326, Call, text, or chat 24/7; To text, type START to 678-678; thetrevorproject.org/about. The Trevor Project provides crisis intervention and suicide intervention to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.

School Counselors
Three full-time counselors (distinct from our college counseling staff), including doctorates in psychology and a licensed social worker, are readily available to meet with students or parents separately, or speak with families together about challenges they may be facing. In addition to their regular presence throughout the school day, whether in Morning Meetings with students or periodic visits to advisories, for example, our counselors routinely consult with teachers and advisors to support their interactions with Pingry students. The Counseling Department also organizes a number of events during the year, such as Lower School, Middle School, and Upper School coffees with parents; student workshops focused on wellness skills and safety (both physical and mental); and more.

Academic and Social-Emotional Specialist
Pingry's Academic and Social-Emotional Specialist partners closely with key structures within the school in order to help integrate social and emotional learning into both existing and reimagined student support programs and services. A key element of this role is advancing community well-being initiatives and ensuring alignment and overall effectiveness of the student support program.

Learning Specialist 
Pingry strives to support all of our students and help them reach their full potential. Pingry's Learning Specialist works closely with students, teachers, and parents to better understand where a student is struggling. After better understanding where students require support, the Learning Specialist collaborates with individual students and their support teams to determine a plan for improvement in the specific areas of struggle.

Pingry also provides Official Accommodation Plans (OAPs) for students who are deemed to be eligible. OAPs provide testing accommodations for students whose disabilities interfere with their learning. 

Need a distraction or relaxation break during your day? Check out Pingry's Virtual Relaxation Room for ideas to help calm your mind, reduce stress, and recharge. Explore some of our favorite apps, websites, breathing techniques, music, and more. 

Dip into some of our favorite resources, geared to supporting parents or guardians of children and teens. Curated by our counseling staff, they cover a variety of topics across a range of media—websites, social media, videos, articles, and podcasts.

• How to Talk to Your Child about Feelings and Mental Health. Talking to your child about their feelings and mental health can be, well… hard. Don’t know what to say? Worried you might make it worse? These resources offer some practical and straightforward advice on how to more confidently engage:

  • Video—talking to your teen about mental health

  • Article with role play videos—how to talk about mental health

  • Conversation guide—what to do if you are concerned about your teen's mental health

  • Short article—talking to kids when they need help

• Advice by Child Psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour. Dr. Damour has presented to Pingry parents and employees and she publishes a monthly adolescence column in the New York Times, among many professional credits. She offers a plethora of relevant, sound, and practical resources on her website. Check out the "Articles, Podcasts and Resources"* tabs on her website https://www.drlisadamour.com/ (*Resources are available in English and Spanish)

  Highlights:
  • Article—Helping a Teen Who Is Angry About House Rules on COVID

  • Podcast—What Do I Do When Friends and Family Don't Share Our Covid Rules?

• Bookmark—How to Manage a Meltdown

• Effective School Solutions Parent Webinars.This year, Pingry partnered with the local organization, Effective School Solutions, to provide two brief webinars for parents about timely subjects: supporting children’s learning and taking care of yourself. Each webinar was designed to be bite-sized with practical suggestions. 

  • What Parents Can Do: Supporting Your Child’s Learning During Stressful Times (17 minutes)

  • Put Your Mask on First: Prioritizing Self-Care (18 minutes) 

• Pingry's Emotional and Mental Wellness Library Guide. Pingry counselor Maurisa Thomas, M.A. teamed up with Pingry librarian Paula Fischer to compile a selection of useful resources geared towards students and parents. Check out the TED Talk video about taking care of your mental health, book recommendations, articles, podcasts, app suggestions, and more. 

• Child Mind Institute. Browse a wealth of resources available for parents on a variety of topics related to supporting children when and where they need it most (*Resources are available in English and Spanish). 

  Highlights:
  • We recommend checking out a curated compilation of resources specific to supporting families during COVID-19 at Child Mind Institute COVID Coping Resources.

• Greater Good In Action. Discover simple practices, based on scientific studies, to improve your social and emotional well-being, or the well-being of others. This guide introduces easy, everyday ideas for a happier, more meaningful life.  

  Highlights: 

  • Time Capsule: Rediscovering Ordinary Experiences to Bring Unexpected Joy

  • Shared Identity: How to Encourage Generosity by Finding Commonalities Between People 

  • Raisin Meditation:  Cultivate Mindfulness, Reduce Stress, and Enjoy Everyday Pleasures

• Additional Articles, Podcasts, Videos, & Webinars. It’s OK for parents to not feel so okay these days.  Recognize the signs of parent burnout, learn about why self-care is important, and learn new parenting tips to help both you and your children. 

  • Articles

    • The Other Side of Languishing is Flourishing. Here's How to Get There.

    • A Guide to Finding Joy in the Little Things

    • Self-care Is Child-care

    • How to Teach Resilience to Kids

    • 9 Psychology Practices to Lead Yourself Through a Crisis

    • Emptying the Dishwasher Can Enrich Kids' Mental Health

    • Five Ways Science Says to Handle Difficult Times

    • Subscribe to Weekly Targeted New York Times Newsletters. We recommend NYT Parenting, NYT Well, and NYT Well Family.

  • Podcasts

    • 9 Podcasts to Soothe Your Coronavirus Anxiety

    • Ask Lisa—The Psychology of Parenting Podcast with Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan

    • The Daily Shine—A daily podcast-meets-meditation to help you slow down, show kindness to yourself, and help you set your intention for the day or week.

    • Healthy Screen Time for Kids—22-minute podcast with recommendations for parents around how to maintain a healthy balance of screen time in their home.

  • Videos 

    • Quick Scientifically Grounded Stress Management Techniques—Learn five quick techniques you can practice right away to help manage stress during COVID-19, AND learn the science behind why they work.

    • Talking to Your Teen About Mental Health

  • Webinars

    • This year, Pingry Pingry partnered with the local organization, Effective School Solutions, to provide two brief webinars for parents about timely subjects: supporting children’s learning and taking care of yourself. Each webinar was designed to be bite-sized with practical suggestions. 

      • What Parents Can Do: Supporting Your Child’s Learning During Stressful Times (17 minutes)

      • Put Your Mask on First: Prioritizing Self-Care (18 minutes) 

    • Additional webinar—Helping Your Child (Re)Adjust to Remote Learning A recording of this event, with Pingry's Learning Specialist Marcy Cohen, provides tips on how students can best organize their space and time, and remain engaged in their virtual classrooms. 

• Social Media Recommendations

  • Subscribe to Pingry’s Instagram and Facebook accounts. Pingry's "Mindful Monday" and "Well-being Wednesday" posts will highlight well-being tips and events/resources. 

Browse through these helpful resources from Pingry counselors, librarians, and teachers.

Middle and Upper School Students

• Pingry's Emotional and Mental Wellness Library Guide. Pingry counselor Maurisa Thomas and Pingry librarian Paula Fischer compiled a great selection of useful resources for students and parents. Check out the TED Talk video about taking care of your mental health, book recommendations, articles, podcasts, app suggestions, and more.  

  • To unpack some of the resources in the above link, check out the Teen Health Matters podcasts, where you will find episodes on the following topics: Keeping Connections; Having an Honest Conversation: Talking about Mental Health with Parents; Strategies for Coping with Social Distancing; and Finding your Sources of Strength.

• Help Yourself or a Friend in Trouble

  • Here's a guide to How to Help a Friend, so you know the warning signs for someone who's in trouble, what you can say, and what to do to help. For additional advice: NAMI Student Guide to Mental Health.

• Mental Health Issue Struggles

  • From one teenager to another, learn 10 Things Every Teen Should Know About Dealing with a Mental Health Issue. 

• Improve Your Well-being 

  • Combat "Zoom fatigue" with the latest strategies and tips from experts and students. Learn more: How students are fighting Zoom fatigue

  • Well-being is more than just happiness and EVERYONE can have it. Check out what true well-being can do for you by trying out these 5 Steps to Mental Well-being. Then, Connect, Get Active, Learn, Give, and Be Aware

  • Greater Good In Action. Discover simple practices, based on scientific studies, to improve your social and emotional well-being, or the well-being of others. This guide introduces easy, everyday ideas for a happier, more meaningful life.  

    Highlights: 

    • Time Capsule: Rediscovering Ordinary Experiences to Bring Unexpected Joy

    • Shared Identity: How to Encourage Generosity by Finding Commonalities Between People 

    • Raisin Meditation:  Cultivate Mindfulness, Reduce Stress, and Enjoy Everyday Pleasures

• Manage Your Music

  • Learn how music affects your brain and your mood… then crank up the volume! Read more to better understand the link between music and well-being: How Music Can Support Your Well-being.

  • For links to a range of different music tracks, check out the Calming Music section in Pingry's Virtual Relaxation Room.

• Navigate Through Difficulties

  • Learning healthy ways to move through the difficulties we face in life can help us cope better and start moving in the right direction as we navigate challenges. This article will teach several new practices to help you respond more effectively: Five Ways Science Says to Handle Difficult Times

Lower School Students

• Library Link for Wellness and Mindfulness Books

  • Pingry's Lower School librarian Ann D'Innocenzo created a Pathfinder on the library website that lists the books, subjects, and summaries of  the wellness and mindfulness titles in the school's collection. 

• Entertainment and Activities

  • Attention Harry Potter Fans! Learn how to make Harry Potter–themed projects (like recreating the Marauder's Map and other DIY projects) on Magical Mischief YouTube channel.

  • Journaling. Either use a blank journal, or a journal with writing prompts, to help stay calm, positive, and grateful. Here are a few sample journals, suggested by one of our counselors: The Mindfulness Journal for Kids or The Creative Gratitude Journal for Kids.

  • Yoga for Kids (and their Grownups)

In addition to the  "Parent Resources" offered above, take a peek at these employee-specific resources to better support you, whether you're in person and away from campus.

• Counseling & Support

  • CONCERN Behavioral Management and Solutions from Atlantic Healthcare. All Pingry employees and household members (regardless of relationship) have free access to CONCERN Behavioral Management and Solutions from Atlantic Healthcare. CONCERN provides counseling services for work and personal problems, as well as coaching services regarding work goals and personal change. Call 800-242-7371 Monday-Friday from 9:00 a.m.–5:00 p.m. to set up an appointment. ALL SERVICES ARE CONFIDENTIAL. Explore these links for more information about CONCERN and for CONCERN's brochure. 

• Colleague Connections

  • Coffee with Colleagues. Join our weekly "Coffee with Colleagues" sessions to share and engage with one another about any challenges that you may be facing. These are also a nice way to offer or receive support, or just connect and spend time together away from your work.

  • Weekly Guided Meditations. Join colleagues Lil Torres and Trish Wheeler for Tuesday morning guided meditations from 10:00 a.m.–10:20-30 a.m. on the Basking Ridge Campus. 

• Podcast Recommendations

  • Work-Life with Adam Grant. Join Wharton professor and organizational psychologist Adam Grant as he invites you inside some really unusual places, interviews motivational leaders, and provides suggestions for how to "make work not suck." Here are a few of our favorite episodes:

    • Burnout is Everyone's Problem

    • How to Love Criticism

    • When Work Takes Over Your Life

• Resources for People of Color

  • Advice for People of Color in Independent Schools. This short video offers advice and insights from POCC attendees about working in independent schools. (5 minutes)

  • Self-Care and Mindfulness Strategies. Hear from a National Association of Independent Schools (NAIS) member about strategies for independent school employees of color who want to help their students, and themselves, achieve balance and feel empowered when faced with challenges. (3 minutes)

• Favorite Apps

  • For inspiration and guided meditations (to help with stress/anxiety, sleep, improved focus, and more), check out a few of our favorites:

    • Headspace (free offer for educators)

    • InsightTimer

    • Calm

    • Ten Percent Happier (newsletter and podcast also available)

       

• Pingry's Virtual Relaxation Room

  • Explore our updated Virtual Relaxation Room with recommendations for some of our favorite apps, mindfulness resources, music selections, and other ideas to provide a welcome respite during your day.

Well-Being Spotlight

• From Stress to Strength: Finding Growth in the Pandemic (password protected). For this year's Gilbert H. Carver '79 Memorial Lecture, which supports open dialogue on self-esteem and acceptance, Dr. Lisa Damour shared with Middle and Upper School students the importance of "belonging." Dr. Damour also discussed ways to manage self-care, personal growth, and maintaining general well-being during these difficult times. In their advisories, Middle School and Upper School students explored the themes of this year's Carver Lecture and discussed their reactions. To continue this conversation at home, please see the parent conversation guide for ideas regarding ways to approach these topics. You can also learn more about the event, including reading event highlights, in our recent article.  *Note - the recording of this lecture will only be available for a limited time. This event took place on April 8, 2021.

• Well-Being Roundtable Discussion. Friday, March 5, 2021, 9:00 a.m. Please join other Pingry parents in a facilitated roundtable discussion about the importance and challenges of parents taking care of themselves. With the more limited opportunities for informal parent-to-parent socialization, this is a wonderful chance to connect with one another for validation, humor, and new ideas. Check the latest Big Blue Bulletin for the link to RSVP (you will need a Zoom link to join).

• Put Your Mask on First: Prioritizing Self-Care Webinar. Attention parents and caregivers… why is it so much easier to take care of others than it is ourselves? After 11 months of a pandemic, self-care is not a luxury but a necessity because caregiver fatigue is real. Identify your barriers to self-care, then learn about the seven types of self-care activities and simple ways to build those into your day. Please take time to watch this brief webinar (18 minutes) entitled.

Our Upper School Peer Group and Peer Leadership programs—in which selected seniors partner with groups of freshmen in a year-long mentoring capacity to help them navigate academic and social concerns—are enriching opportunities for students to share with and learn from one another. By connecting freshmen with seniors who have completed leadership training, students create new connections as they participate in non-adult led programming. Pingry faculty select peer leaders who are positive role models and can serve as trusted resources for younger Pingry students. Our goal is for all students to feel supported on campus and to provide them with additional mentors beyond their teachers and coaches.

In both the Middle School and Upper School, students can join Affinity Groups, which are designed to be safe spaces for students to learn more about their various identities and to discuss their questions, comments, and concerns with others who share that same identity. Affinity groups can help students feel supported by peers and adults in their community, as well as help them develop greater self confidence and feel connected to campus. 

Additionally, students play an active role in creating wellness-related programs on campus, through Pingry's Student Wellness Club, founded by Upper School students in 2018. Promoting the overall physical and mental well-being of Pingry students, club members plan events that address student needs; organize activities that focus on mental health education, prevention, and awareness; and work to reduce the stigma of mental illness. A sample of the club's activities include:

• Nature walks

• Yoga classes

• Therapy dog visits

• Participation in the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention's "Out of the Darkness" walk.

• Creation of a "Positivity Wall" on campus, where students spread positivity by writing notes of gratitude and inspiration for others to read.

• Participation as panelists at the 2020 inaugural Interscholastic Mental Health Conference, which involved sharing ideas with other schools around mental health on campus and talking about ways to make changes to school culture. 

From fire safety and basic hygiene in the Lower School, to physical development, citizenship, decision-making, and substance abuse in the Middle School, to courses in Basic Life Support, First Aid, and Emergency Medical Responder certification in the Upper School, Pingry’s health education curriculum is designed to equip students with skills for emotional, social, and physical health. Students in all divisions learn techniques for problem-solving, relaxation, and stress management, with opportunities to practice these skills in a safe, supportive environment.

For details about our health curriculum for each division, please see below:

Lower School Middle School Upper School

Foundational to Pingry's student wellness programming is its Advisory program. Each Lower School student has a homeroom teacher who acts as the primary point of contact for the student’s family, which becomes especially relevant in the latter years of the Lower School when students have different teachers for each subject area. In Grade 5, the Advisory program involves students meeting three days a week in their homeroom and twice a week in a larger group to discuss issues such as adjusting to Grade 5, schedule and workload, and friendship issues.  

In the Middle and Upper Schools, students are assigned an advisor—a faculty or staff member—who serves as a family's primary point of contact throughout the school year. Advisors help their advisees negotiate an array of topics—from the academic program to the school’s social experiences and anything in between—that may be a source of concern for a student. Advisors are routinely in touch with their advisees’ teachers, coaches, and parents, and are available to facilitate assistance in situations when a student requires additional support. 

Beyond receiving individual support from their advisor, all Middle and Upper School students are also part of an advisory group. In the Upper School, students meet for 25 minutes per week during a dedicated advisory period to discuss a range of non-academic topics and build connections within a familial, supportive environment. In the Middle School, advisory is a daily, ungraded class, that, like its academic counterparts, follows a structured, grade-specific curriculum: Grade 6 examines kindness and community, Grade 7 focuses on leadership, and Grade 8 explores the question, "What do I stand for?" Middle School advisors also facilitate a close-knit group dynamic and guide student-led parent-teacher conferences, helping each student set individual goals and providing support and guidance toward meeting them throughout the year.

Speakers & Assemblies

Pingry routinely welcomes outside speakers—experts in a variety of fields— and hosts assemblies across a wide range of timely topics. Below is a sampling of visitors to the Basking Ridge Campus, who, after their presentations, take time to speak in a more intimate setting with students, faculty, and staff.

• Peter Horn, Ed.D— Founder of Horn, LLC, former teacher, and administrator, spoke to faculty and staff about civil discourse, including issues related to the 2020 election.

• Dr. Lisa Damour, Ph.D–Psychologist, best-selling author, and New York Times monthly columnist, spoke to faculty and staff about how to manage stress and anxiety under COVID-19.

• Dr. Michael Thompson, Ph.D.–New York Times bestselling author of The Pressured Child, school consultant, and international speaker on the subjects of children, schools, and parenting.

• Sean Swarner–Inspirational pediatric cancer survivor who spotlights how perseverance and self-belief propelled him past obstacles to ultimately summit Mt. Everest.

• Dr. Joel Nunez–NJ-licensed psychologist, author, and public speaker who shares timeless insights about self care and burn out that resonate with learners of all ages

• Tony Hoffman–BMX Elite Pro and 2016 Olympic Games coach, who turned his life around after battling drug addiction, mental illness, and incarceration.

• Andrew Ominus–Successful college athlete who shared his personal story of struggle and recovery from depression and anxiety in a presentation for the non-profit organization, Minding Your Mind.

• Qwell Meditation & Wellness Studio—Provides monthly guided meditation sessions to Lower School faculty and staff.

Guiding students to discover the life balance that is right for them is an essential outcome of a Pingry education. A range of unique school features and programming are in place to ensure that their overall well-being—just like their intellectual growth— is an area of continual focus and development. 

Similarly, school administrators and faculty consistently remain open and willing to explore new wellness initiatives. 

Below are a few examples of the ways in which life balance is nurtured at Pingry:

• Flexible Scheduling: Block scheduling in the Middle and Upper Schools means that longer classes meet on a rotating basis, not everyday, and ample “flex” periods are built into the school day to ensure unhurried transitions between classes. In 2019, a later time of 8:30 a.m. was implemented for classes on our Basking Ridge Campus.

• Project Week: In place of final exams, at the end of the school year, Middle School students engage in a hands-on, multidisciplinary, culminating project experience known as Project Week.

• Getting Outside: Outdoor learning opportunities abound on our nearly 200-acre Basking Ridge Campus, which includes a kitchen garden, campsite, and outdoor classroom, as well as on our Short Hills Campus, which also boasts a garden, state-of-the-art playground, and surrounding woodlands that are used by classes.

• Anti-bullying Programs: In the Middle School, appropriate social media behavior and anti-bullying and violence prevention are addressed through such successful programs and visiting organizations as #winatsocial and Prepare, Inc. Upper School students also benefit from Prepare Inc. in learning boundary setting, how to diffuse uncomfortable or dangerous situations, how to report danger to an adult, and other important self-defense strategies.

• Decisions Course: Offered in all grades of the Lower School and year-long Decisions classes for Grade 4 and 5 students address important, non-academic skills, such as managing emotions, friendship skills, personal safety, conflict resolution, time management, problem-solving, and bullying prevention with peers. 

• Mindfulness: Mindfulness programming is woven throughout all three divisions: a mindfulness course in the Upper School, Mindfulness Club in the Middle School, and mindfulness and meditation sessions for Lower School students, faculty, and staff. 

• Surveys: Pingry administers the Authentic Connections Student Resilience Survey, which is an anonymous survey that assesses measures of student well-being and modifiable aspects of student life most relevant to the current climate. Pingry also administers the Independent School Health Check Survey every few years to ascertain the health and wellness of our student body, and to better understand areas for improvement so that school programming can be adapted accordingly.

• Connection and Community: Across school divisions, we offer a variety of wellness-related activities, such as yoga and mindfulness, Family Bingo Night, movie night, Hour of Wellness, Grandparents and Special Friends Day, and therapy dog visits incorporated throughout the school year; foosball and ping pong tables are staples of both the Middle and Upper School Commons, and well used during flex time!

• Leisure/Hobby Opportunities: In the Upper School, extracurricular and club offerings abound, including the Student Wellness Club, Outing Club, Book Appreciation Club, and Taiko Drumming, and, for example, Dance Club, Comic Book Club, and Film and Photography Club in the Middle School. An array of after-school enrichment classes are also offered each trimester at the Middle and  Lower School.